Best Sex Books for Men in 2023

11 min read
Best Sex Books for Men in 2023

Books are often overlooked as a resource in this day and age, with the internet being such a huge factor in all of our lives. This is unfortunate since books can often be more reliable than the internet when it comes to finding advice, especially when it comes to subjects like sex.

The internet is a wonderful place, but given that literally, anyone can post anything they want, it can't always compete with the research and knowledge that can be found in the best books. Additionally, most books that have been available for at least a couple of years will have plenty of reviews that can help you work out whether they're worth obtaining.

We've put together this list of some of the sex books we believe to be the best and most helpful for men who are looking to make some improvements to their sex lives.

The only problem is, sometimes it can be difficult to know where to look, and what exactly to look for when it comes to finding books. Unless you're in a physical bookstore, you can't always flick through the pages to ensure it's what you want, and even then, you can't guarantee you'll find the whole book useful.

The books on this list cover a mixture of topics, all of which we consider to be relevant to modern men from all walks of life

In an attempt to make the book-finding process a little simpler, we've put together this list of some of the sex books we believe to be the best and most helpful for men who are looking to make some improvements to their sex lives. The books on this list cover a mixture of topics, all of which we consider to be relevant to modern men from all walks of life - so we're sure you'll come across something that'll suit your needs!

BOOK TITLE AUTHOR/S
The New Male Sexuality Bernie Zilbergeld
She Comes First Ian Kerner
The Penis Book Aaron Spitz MD
The Best Oral Sex Ever Yvonne K. Fulbright
The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure Charlie Glickman & Aislinn Emirzian
Mating in Captivity Esther Perel
The Erotic Mind Jack Morin

The New Male Sexuality

Best for: Men wanting a more fulfilling sex life!

The New Male Sexcuality Book Cover


An absolute classic from the nineties, The New Male Sexuality, Revised Edition sets out to answer both men's and women's "most urgent questions" regarding the titular topic.

This self-help sensation continues to assist men to this day by providing 20 years worth of insight from the author - a psychologist whose specialty was human sexuality - and other similar experts.

It's thoughtful, it's witty, and it keeps things realistic, all of which contributed to making it a book that has been improving sex lives for decades.

It's thoughtful, it's witty, and it keeps things realistic, all of which contributed to making it a book that has been improving sex lives for decades - and will likely continue to do so for many more!

About the author

Dr. Bernie Zilbergeld (1939 - 2002) received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology from the University of California (UC) Berkeley, before going on to become the head of the Men's Program, as well as the co-director of clinical training at the Human Sexuality Program, at UC San Francisco. It's safe to say that Zilbergeld definitely knew his stuff, and poured his expertise into multiple best-sellers about the sexuality of men, many of which challenged common misconceptions surrounding the topic while also being incredible self-help resources.

Why is it good?

In his own words, Zilbergeld's works explore assumptions including those such as ''a man always wants and is always ready to have sex,'' ''sex equals intercourse,'' and ''good sex requires orgasm,'' all of which are still wrongfully held by men today. The New Male Sexuality, Revised Edition is the most up-to-date version of his original Male Sexuality (1978), and as such is the ultimate guide for men of all ages, helping them come to terms with and understand their sexual desires, and get the most out of their sex lives.

The ultimate guide for men of all ages, helping them come to terms with and understand their sexual desires, and get the most out of their sex lives.

 

She Comes First

Best for: Men interested in learning how to fully satisfy a woman!

She Comes First Book Cover

Aiming to properly satisfy a woman is a noble goal. The only problem is that a lot of men are, as this book's author **puts it, "ill-cliterate."She Comes First zeroes in on and provides a comprehensive guide to the clitoris, focusing on how it's really the key player when it comes to female sexuality and pleasure.

She Comes First  provides a comprehensive guide to the clitoris, focusing on how it's really the key player when it comes to female sexuality and pleasure.

There are even reviews for the book by women, stating that it helped them learn new things about their own bodies, which speaks for itself. If you're serious about showing a special woman an incredible time, Kerner has you covered with his "cool sense of humor and obsessive desire to inform," as stated by The New York Times.

About the author

Dr. Ian Kerner is a psychotherapist and sex counselor whose work has been featured in publications such as The Atlantic, The Economist, and The New York Times, all of which often quote him as an expert. He received postgraduate certification, and remains on the faculty teaching sex therapy courses, at ICP's Psychotherapy Center for Gender and Sexuality, and the Family and Couples Treatment divisions.

That's all when he's not busy being a member of numerous associations including the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and the Society for Sex Therapy & Research or writing New York Times best-selling books (She Comes First being just one of them) which contain high-quality advice for individuals and couples alike.

Why is it good?

She Comes First encourages men to think less about intercourse, and more about using their "hands and mouths, bodies and minds" to truly satisfy both themselves and the women they're interested in pleasuring. This also helps free men of common penis-related worries about performance, size, and stamina. Once you understand the true potential of everything at your disposal, you begin to feel much more confident about sex in general!

The Penis Book

Best for: Men who are interested in learning more about their penises!

The Penis Book Cover

If you've got a penis, you're probably well acquainted with it. But are you sure you're treating it right? The Penis Book poses this question to men before tackling it head-on, answering just about any other question you might have about your own penis - or anyone else's for that matter - along the way. It covers every base from anatomy and blood flow to sexually transmitted infections, and even to penis care, exercises, and maintenance - nothing is off the table here and men (and their penises) are all the healthier for it.

About the author

Dr. Aaron Spitz - AKA "America's favorite penis doctor" - is a urologist specializing in male reproductive medicine and male sexual health. Over his 21 years of experience as a urologist, Dr. Spitz has performed a wide range of procedures such as vasectomies, microsurgical vasectomy reversal, and even non-surgical treatments for Peyronie's disease, and is considered an expert on male hormone replacement and sexual dysfunction.

He was presented with the Distinguished Service Award by the American Urological Association in 2020 for his years of excellent service to the American Medical Association - and those are just a couple of the associations he's a highly regarded member of. As you can imagine, all this work and experience results in The Penis Book being filled to the brim with scientific tips that are beneficial to every man!

Dr. Spitz was kind enough to send us a quote about the book:

"The Penis book is intended to help men and women understand how the penis works, how to keep it healthy, and what to do when it’not"

Why is it good?

Gaining a better understanding of your penis and everything about it is always worthwhile, especially when considering that many men find it difficult to discuss their private thoughts and concerns related to their members.

The Penis Book is a brilliant, medically, and scientifically accurate resource for all things concerning the penis, and it's clear and funny to boot.

If you've ever had a question about your penis, or feel like you could in the future, this is the book that will get it answered.

The Best Oral Sex Ever

Best for: Men who want to become oral sex aficionados!

 The Best Oral Sex Ever

Performing oral sex on a woan be honed - and with enough practice, it can be perfected. That's where The Best Oral Sex Ever comes in - this book is a no-nonsense guide to cunnilingus written for men, by a woman who knows exactly what she's talking about. Full of tips, tricks, and techniques on subjects ranging from broaching the subject to a nervous partner, to initiating the act and finally getting down to business, this is a one-stop shop for all things oral!

About the author

Dr. Yvonne K. Fulbright is a sexologist, TV personality, prolific author, and certified sexuality educator through the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT). She is highly educated, having received a Ph.D. from New York University and pursued a post-doctoral fellowship at the University of Iceland, where she focused on sexual health services for young people.

Over the years she's written as a sex columnist for Cosmopolitan, Disaboom, Fox News, and Women's Health, as well as writing as a sex blogger for The Huffington Post, and being a freelance writer. Fullbright has also made numerous media appearances as a host and sex expert for Comcast's Dating on Demand and CherryTV, and co-hosted Sex Files on Sirius Maxim's Channel 108.

As a sexuality educator, she has taught at various colleges including American University, New York University, and the University of Pennsylvania, and was also a professor, teaching human sexuality, at Argosy University. She has channeled her expertise into becoming an all-around "sexpert", advocating for sex education, and has authored a myriad of books aimed at improving sex lives, all of which are amazing reads for men and women alike.

Why is it good?

Discussing oral sex tips with other guys can only get you so far, as, after all, they aren't the ones being eaten out! You really need to look to women in order to get the best advice, which is partially why The Best Oral Sex Ever - His Guide to Going Down stands out as such an amazing resource. Fullbright is a total expert on women's sexuality and has packed this book full of all the info you need when it comes to performing oral.

This is a serious game-changer, covering both sensitive topics and straightforward practical advice with the same fantastic attention to detail.

The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure

Best for: Men interested in prostate play!

The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure Book Cover

Prostate play is a tantalizing topic, but many men are unsure, concerned, or even scared about giving it a go! If that sounds like you, have no fear - The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure lives up to its name. Leaving no stone unturned and covering topics including anal sex, massages, milking, orgasms, sex toys, and even pegging, this book is truly the quintessential guide to the P-spot, whether you're a beginner, or are someone with experience looking to take things further than ever before!

About the authors

Dr. Charlie Glickman is an AASECT-certified sexuality educator, university professor, and writer, with over 30 years of experience in the field of sex and relationships. Aislinn Emirzian is also a sex coach and sex educator. Both have taught sex and sexuality workshops, helping enhance the sex lives of couples and individuals. The book also features a foreword by Dr. Carol Queen, who has a Ph.D. in human sexuality and puts her knowledge to use in her career as a sexologist and writer. Essentially, this means The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure is backed up by a staggering amount of sexual expertise, making it a resource like no other!

Why is it good?

As we mentioned earlier, for one reason or another, a lot of men have never experienced the joys of prostate play, and that's a damn shame! What Glickman and Emirzian have put together here is a blessing to everyone with a prostate, detailing the best ways of stimulating the P-spot during solo play and sex with a partner, while also empowering men to have the confidence to explore every aspect of their sexuality.

This book is a blessing to everyone with a prostate, detailing the best ways of stimulating the P-spot during solo play and sex with a partner.

Mating in Captivity

Best for: Men and couples in committed, long-term relationships!

Mating in Captivity Book Cover

Mating in Captivity's author argues that domesticity and sexual desire often struggle to coexist - but that this doesn't have to be the case. Examining how lust and passion can sometimes fade in committed relationships while explaining what can be done to rekindle the fire and keep that desire going strong, this book is a must-read for long-term couples and anyone who's hoping to settle down one day.

About the author

Esther Perel is a trained psychodynamic psychotherapist who has worked with both couples and families, and was also a clinical instructor at the New York University School of Medicine for 13 years. Perel's beliefs that the expectation of marriage and long-term relationships have taken on "epic proportions" have led to her advocating for discussions surrounding monogamy to take on a much more candid and truthful form, in order to bridge the aforementioned gap between domesticity and eroticism - which has informed her writing.

Why is it good?

Loss of desire can poison an otherwise healthy relationship, but with Mating in Captivity, Perel has discovered the antidote. Even in the most settled, long-term relationships, there are ways to make things exciting again and get that sexy spark back, and this book is a guide to doing just that. Smart, witty, and easy to understand, Mating in Captivity is a real no-brainer, and has received glowing praise. If you're looking to add some magic to monogamy, this book will help you accomplish that goal.

Smart, witty, and easy to understand, Mating in Captivity is a real no-brainer, and has received glowing praise.

The Erotic Mind

Best for: Men interested in the psychology behind sex and eroticism!

The Erotic Mind Book Cover


Another gem from the nineties, The Erotic Mind takes a deep dive into the "least understood dimensions of human sexuality." Exploring the complex psychology of arousal, desire, and fulfillment, this book isn't afraid to address various provocative topics and "paradoxes" regarding eroticism, such as how negative emotions like anxiety and anger can end up turning people on, how issues and trauma from our pasts can manifest sexually later in our lives, and how being spontaneous and dynamic can be the key to amazing sex.

About the author

Dr. Jack Morin (1946 - 2013) was a licensed psychotherapist and certified sex therapist, as well as a diplomat of the American Board of Sexology. Known for bravely exploring places no one else was bold enough to tread, Morin filled his works with details from multitudes of sexual experiences, many of which were stories from his patients or obtained through his anonymous "Sexual Excitement Survey" which provided responses and anecdotes ripe for analysis. With years of experience in his field, Morin ensured his books (including this one) are full of invaluable insight!

Why is it good?

Sexual self-discovery can be tricky, which is why men over the years have been so grateful for discovering The Erotic Mind. Delving far further into human psychology than most

This book addresses mystery after mystery on the subject of sex and the erotic mind, challenging various commonly accepted theories

While also helping the reader understand the specifics of their own preferences. That's all while being clear and straightforward, and without being judgmental - multiple reviewers actually commented on Morin's compassion! This is an interesting one, and a great read.

Summary

Sex books can contain a wealth of information about specific topics as well as general ones. The books we've mentioned on this list are what we deem to be some of the best sex books available, and are written by authors who are known for being experts and reliable sources. The key to finding the right sex book for you is to carefully consider what aspects of your sex life you'd like to improve, before researching authors and their works which cover said aspects.

Since the books we've discussed here go over numerous topics in detail, with any luck, there will be something that you'll find to be of great assistance. At any rate, they all contain interesting, valuable information, and feature incredible tips that any man would do well to take on board. With the right resources, anyone can make positive improvements to their sex lives, and the books on this list are fantastic places to start!

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