Prostate Massage and Orgasm: The Beginners Guide to Milking your P-Spot

12 min read
Prostate Massage and Orgasm: The Beginners Guide to Milking your P-Spot

The prostate plays a vital part in the male reproductive system, but it's also a pretty explosive pleasure point for anyone willing to take the time to get to know it better, accessing its unique sensations. If you're open to a little exploration, we think you'll love what you find. Prostate orgasms bring something entirely new to the table.

Part of its job is to produce prostate fluid that mixes with sperm and other fluids to create semen or ejaculate. It also contains the muscles that help expel the semen along the urethra during ejaculation. The bonus is how it feels. Whether you enjoy a sole prostate orgasm or combine it with a penile orgasm, you're getting far more bang for your buck, accessing completely different pleasure sensors when you climax.

Massaging or milking involves stimulating the gland until it releases a thin, milky fluid from the penis. Prostate stimulation delivers both therapeutic benefits as well as those highly pleasurable sensations, which is why it's recommended for both good health and your enhanced sexual pleasure.

Prostate orgasms are renowned for their intensity, which is why their stimulation contributes increasingly to the sex life of prostate owners—whatever their sexual orientation

Prostate orgasms are renowned for their intensity, which is why their stimulation contributes increasingly to the sex life of prostate owners—whatever their sexual orientation. Where a penile orgasm is generally considered local to the genitals, a prostate orgasm can be an entire body sensation. Who wouldn't want to upgrade to that?

What is prostate massaging?

Prostate massage is a way of releasing fluid and pressure from your prostate gland. It's considered to offer several health benefits as well as exceptional sexual stimulation.

Prostate-induced orgasms are a fuller and more intense experience than regular penile orgasms, scoring far higher up the intensity and explosive scale—so, what are you waiting for?

Who can do it?

Not everyone has a prostate, so only those assigned male at birth will have one. Prostate owners may prefer to explore on their own before sharing the experience with a partner if deciding to share it at all.

It's far easier to direct someone else towards what works for you if you know yourself well. Only time, patience, and exploration will open the doors to the ultimate prostate orgasm.

However, prostate play, massage, or milking isn't limited to solo masturbation or sexual activity. Anal play can be used as foreplay to regular or anal sex or simply to achieve a solo orgasm. As one of the more sensitive erogenous zones, it's a great area to explore when you're turned on, to enjoy alone or with a partner.

Anal play can be used as foreplay to regular or anal sex or simply to achieve a solo orgasm

But first, to experience P-spot orgasms, you'll need to know where it is and how to work it.

Where is the prostate, and how do you find it?

The prostate gland is located around 2 or 3 inches inside the rectum, just under the bladder. It's about the size of a walnut and wraps around the urethra (the tube from which urine leaves the bladder).

Comparative to tracking down the female G-spot, the P-spot (or male G-spot as it's widely known) is soon detected with a little exploration and practice. You can pinpoint it from inside or outside the rectum by feeling or sensation from stimulating its thousands of surrounding nerve endings.

Once you feel suitably stimulated, you should have less trouble tracking it down and beginning your first massage

It swells with the additional blood flow of being sexually aroused, becoming easier to locate, so to make the process easier, relax and do whatever usually turns you on. Once you feel suitably stimulated, you should have less trouble tracking it down and beginning your first massage.

When you find it, we're pretty sure you'll know it; especially when you stroke it just the right way. Chances are, with that new tingle at the end of your fingers, your eyes will pop open that little bit wider, as will the grin on your face.

Locating the prostate externally

From the outside, you need to feel your way along your perineum (often called the taint). This is the area between your scrotum and anus. It's firmer near the front of the penile hub (the inner end of your penis shaft) and feels softer towards the back (near your anus).

If you start to feel the sensation of needing to urinate, you're in the right place

As you explore, apply a little pressure to the softer, fleshier parts. If you start to feel the sensation of needing to urinate, you're in the right place. If you start to feel things tingle in a really good way, you're definitely in the right place.

For some—and such a lucky group—external stimulation and continued perineum massage can lead to a prostate orgasm alone, but it isn't as easy to achieve as it is from an internal prostate milking. External prostate stimulation can be done manually with the fingers or by using vibrating sex toys and prostate massagers.

Locating the prostate internally

If you're already getting a healthy buzz from working your prostate externally, now's the time to up the ante.

Insert a well-lubed index finger between 2 and 4 inches into your anus along the front wall. Angle your finger towards the belly button, where you should feel a firm bulge around the size of a walnut. Again, you may feel an urge to urinate due to its proximity to the bladder and around the urethra.

Once you're in the right area, a little further exploration and probing, using a few different moves, will reveal what feels good and what doesn't.

Getting used to internal prostate stimulation, whether with a finger or a sex toy, takes a little time and patience. Gently massaging the entrance and moving a little deeper in small stages will lessen the need to clench the anal muscles and provide easier, more comfortable access over time.

If you're new to anal play, it may take a little time to adjust to the experience. Stick with it, though, even if it's not what you're used to; you'll adjust quicker than you think, and the payback will be well worth the effort.

What does it feel like when you touch it?

The prostate is surrounded by thousands of nerve endings that provide sexual sensations leading to prostate orgasm. It's a sensation that not all people like, yet many prefer the feeling prostate pleasure brings compared to penis-based orgasms. It will feel like a small sexual tingle, building to an earth-shattering finale. It's by far the best part of massaging the prostate—in our expert opinion, of course.

What are the benefits of prostate massaging?

Health benefits

As men and prostate owners age, the gland tends to grow. As it does, it can narrow the urethra, causing issues with urination. This is called benign prostatic hyperplasia.

Prostate massage and prostate milking release fluid and pressure on the surrounding areas, lowering prostate inflammation and relieving those suffering lower urinary tract symptoms such as BPH and prostatitis.

Some schools of thought suggest therapeutic stimulation enhances prostate health, alleviating prostate problems

Some schools of thought suggest therapeutic stimulation enhances prostate health, alleviating prostate problems, but there are few studies to provide measured evidence within appropriate test groups. There are also claims that it improves erections and works effectively against erectile dysfunction, yet until more definitive proof is gathered, there are no guarantees.

Finally, prostate massage shows no benefit to those with prostate cancer. In fact, it could encourage tumor cells to break from the gland and spread to nearby tissue, so those with the condition would do better to avoid it.

Sexual benefits

Here's the good part. The sexual benefits of prostate play are many.

We keep stressing (with your best interests at heart, obviously) that a prostate-induced orgasm can deliver sensations you can't replicate in other ways. In addition, it can prepare you for anal sex, broaden your sexual repertoire, and lead you into new elements of butt play, experimenting with various massaging techniques and prostate toys. What's not to like?

Related: Premature Ejaculation: What Causes it and How to Overcome it

What is a prostate orgasm, and what does it feel like?

The climax is regularly described as a full-body orgasm with incredibly heightened sensations. In addition, some experience multiple orgasms through prostate milking—a result rarely achieved with penile orgasms. So multiple orgasms are no longer solely the property of women and vagina owners—how about that for leveling the playing field?

It's easier to understand why prostate orgasms are more intense; they result from 12 pelvic contractions, whereas penile orgasms are associated with far fewer—between just 4 and 8.

What's the difference between prostate orgasms and regular orgasms?

Apart from the different physical sensations and how each requires quite different stimulation, a prostate orgasm, while still providing ejaculate, only delivers the prostatic fluid created in the gland. Also, the recovery time for further sexual activity is quite different—and that's something you're going to really get a kick out of.

The time taken for sexual recovery is known as the refractory period. Prostate orgasms require a far shorter refractory period if any at all, which is why some people can experience multiple orgasms via prostate stimulation. Could you be one of the lucky ones with the ability to pop those immense orgasms one after another? Well, there's only one way to find out...

Are there any risks to prostate massage?

Overly aggressive anal penetration risks minor injury to the rectal lining and skin around the anus. However, when carried out carefully, building up to the pressures and speeds you prefer, there isn't any real risk or danger.

when carried out carefully, building up to the pressures and speeds you prefer, there isn't any real risk or danger

That said, good hygiene is a must while experimenting with anal penetration and internal stimulation. Introducing bacteria internally can cause infections further into the rectum and around the body. Nobody wants that. Infections can be quite nasty and really take the shine off those titanic climaxes.

The Prostate Orgasm

Despite being socially well documented, not everyone achieves a prostate orgasm—and rarely on their first try.

It can take a deal of patience and practice to work up to that first fabulous orgasm. Everyone's sexual organs behave uniquely, so getting to know your own prostate in your own time is essential.

Stimulating the prostate requires more attention than traditional masturbation

Stimulating the prostate requires more attention than traditional masturbation. Achieving orgasm through penile stimulation takes little more than physical encouragement, whereas prostate orgasms tend to require a more relaxed environment and take a little longer to complete.

How to massage the P-Spot

For many, it starts with preparation. It's a good idea to have a shower and clean your anus for hygiene reasons and to avoid any embarrassing situations. Although anal play will undoubtedly lead to the discovery of fecal matter at some point, preparation can limit the chances.

Evacuating the bowel earlier in the day will ensure that the rectum is clear and that any chances of it appearing on fingers, toys, or anything else should be minimal.

Step-by-step guide

  1. Apply a liberal amount of lubrication around the anus and your index finger. Your anus is made from delicate skin, so go slow and careful until you know your limits.

  2. Slowly insert the finger as feels comfortable until you reach the third knuckle and it's fully inserted.

  3. Bend the finger towards the belly button until you find a fleshier-feeling rounded lump. Locating it should introduce new sensations. At this point, you'll start to get an idea of where you want to go next. Listen to your body—it's a great teacher.

  4. Gently massaging the gland using a come hither motion with the pad of your finger should enhance those feelings, bringing you closer to the prostate orgasm feel.

  5. Try applying gentle pressure for 5 to 10 seconds or using circular and back-and-forth techniques to find out what feels better.

  6. Keep stimulating and exploring until you achieve the prostate orgasm you're searching for. Don't despair if it doesn't happen—Rome wasn't built in a day, after all. Enjoy the journey and all the new sensations it brings. When you finally figure it out, it'll make your journey all the sweeter.

Safety tips for prostate massage

  • Make cleanliness and hygiene a priority. Washing your hands, all of your toys, and the anal area will keep you safe and free from nasty surprises. Keep hygienic wipes close by, and remember to clean up properly afterward, using specialist cleaners if your toys need them. Hot soapy water does an excellent job for most applications.

  • Trim and clean your nails. Do we really have to elaborate? Nobody needs those kinds of special surprises. That's not the sensation that makes you jump we're looking for.

  • Start slow and build up to your favorite experiences. Taking your time keeps you relaxed and avoids frustration. You can't rush a prostate orgasm (well, not at first), and feeling frustrated and not being in the right headspace will work against you. It's one erogenous zone that benefits from patience and playful exploration.

  • Be gentle as you develop your preferences. Again, in time you'll learn just what you like, and for some, that could be a very physical interaction. There's no wrong or right, as long as it doesn't hurt or cause damage. Just take your time building up to your biggest kicks. Avoiding unnecessary hospital visits at this point will spare you plenty of embarrassment.

  • Always use plenty of strong lubrication. Lube is your best friend and ally. A super-slippery sensation will make everything more fun as well as provide the comfort and safety such a sensitive area needs. Silicone lube stays slippery for longer, but water-based is a must for use with silicone-made toys.

Best positions for prostate massaging

  • Face down Lying on your stomach keeps things simple and allows easy access. It's a pretty good beginner position, allowing you to stay relaxed and focus on all those new feelings and sensations. You could even lay across your partner's lap.

  • On all fours Globally known as 'doggy', getting on your hands and knees is one of the easiest and most comfortable positions to deliver a prostate orgasm. There's plenty of room and access for fingers, toys, partners, or whatever else floats your boat.

  • Lying on your back Probably the most natural and relaxed position; there's great access from the front and sides—it's maximum comfort, with zero stress on your joints.

  • Lying on your side Lying on your side gives you options to access yourself from the front or from behind. Changing up your play techniques with easy-switch access means you can vary how you stimulate yourself, creating a lot more excitement and aiding your expedition to the finish line and the big rush it brings.

Techniques with sex toys

There are plenty of specialist prostate massagers on the market, all designed for stimulation, orgasm, and pleasure in abundance. They're shaped to find the prostate almost automatically and come with different vibration settings for every preference.

  • Alternate the pressure to achieve different sensations.
  • Toys help you delve deeper and feel fuller than fingers.
  • Use multiple speed and pulse vibrations to mix up sensations.
  • Toys that offer both internal and external stimulation (along the perineum) can help achieve climax faster and with different feelings.


You can stimulate all kinds of erogenous zones with a prostate massager, butt plug, vibrating toys, and strap-ons. Remember, always use a water-based lubricant when playing with silicone toys; you don't want to break down or damage your toys or your body.

Techniques with your fingers

  1. The come hither motion – Bend your finger as though you're encouraging someone to walk towards you, repeating the movement and increasing speed as your pleasure grows.

  2. The doorbell technique – Press the gland as though ringing a doorbell. Apply different pressures using the pad of your finger or hold still at various intervals to find out which brings those big sensations on most effectively.

  3. Circling – Working your way around the gland perimeter at different pressures and speeds brings other sensations. When you find the best combination, use it to build your pleasure.

  4. Tapping to simulate vibration – Vibrations enhance many of our sexual senses, so fast tapping to mimic it can bring enhanced pleasure and orgasm.

Introducing prostate massaging sex toys

Prostate play and stimulating the prostate with new toys adds an extra dimension to your sexual activities—and which one of us wouldn't welcome more ways to play with ourselves that lead to mightier, gut-busting orgasms? Introducing toys to your repertoire means exploring what brings the most pleasure and which toys will replicate and enhance those activities.

However kinky you think you are, with so many prostate toys on the market, there are options for every taste

However kinky you think you are, with so many prostate toys on the market, there are options for every taste. Silicone toys make great introductory and advanced options, as they're easy to clean, soft to the touch, and come in every shape and size. Glass and metal toys relay different temperatures, which can deliver new and different feelings and sensations.

And finally, when it comes to partner play, communication is vital to ensure safe and happy sex. Set your boundaries for each session, guaranteeing you both know where your limits are. Consent is key, so never push anything your partner doesn't like or isn't ready for. With all that taken care of,

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