In a new relationship, you'll be looking for every new and exciting way to spend time with your partner that will lead to more of the great sex you're enjoying. If you're in a long-term relationship, your needs will differ, and the time you spend together is probably more valuable than ever.
For both, date night is crucial to fuelling that fire that keeps your relationship healthy and fun.
For those new couples, it's about exploring each other's desires, needs, and kinks while all those hot and heavy chemicals are flowing, and for those in existing relationships, it's about breaking the routine, developing communication, and strengthening your relationship by rekindling your passion.
Studies (like this one from the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology) show that engaging in activities as a couple brings greater relationship satisfaction that leads to sex.
...engaging in self-expanding activities with a partner is associated with higher sexual desire. In turn, we found that higher desire fueled by self-expansion is associated with greater relationship satisfaction. -- Broadening your horizons: Self-expanding activities promote desire and satisfaction in established romantic relationships
With those essential relationship benefits in mind, here are our favorite sexy date night ideas to keep the spark alive.
1. Role Play Night
Role play derives from 'play-acting,' so embrace the opportunity and let yourself go. The more you lean into it, the better. It's a chance to be someone else entirely or the person you always wanted to be.
It's a great chance to practice confidence, one of the most attractive qualities when choosing a partner.
After the usual chores and routines, creating an unforgettable date night gives you a great reason to forget your daily grind and spend quality time together with a truly sexy twist.
Whether you take your role-playing fun away from home to add a little realism to your date night or keep it in the bedroom, exploring some wild costume ideas and a few new toys to reinvigorate your sex life, the only thing that's holding you back is your imagination.
Our top tips to make role-play date night even more special
One of the most popular date night role plays is picking each other up in a bar, which we'll explore later, but for a sexy date night, given communication is your greatest asset, why not talk about who or what type of person each other would find irresistible and use that as a place to kick things off? From your favorite celebrities to job roles or even locations—who wouldn't want to be wooed by a millionaire, a Hollywood star, or be the first couple to have sex in space?
2. Watch Erotic Movies / Porn Together
Watching an erotic movie together can help stir the feelings missing from your regular date nights. Its most important facet is encouraging you to talk about your fantasies, desires, kinks, and unmet needs in the bedroom. With a good excuse to discuss what you'd like to explore together, watching a few adult movies together can pave the way for much more risque date nights.
A study of heterosexual couples (in the Archives of Sexual Behavior) found that porn use delivered positive outcomes when both partners used it to enhance their sex lives:
Based on the results of a discriminant function analysis, it is suggested that couples where one or both used pornography had a more permissive erotic climate compared to the couples who did not use pornography. -- Use of pornography in a random sample of Norwegian heterosexual couples
Our top tips to make an erotic movie date night even more special
If a glass of wine helps you relax into the mood and be more open to discussing your love life, then dive in—just don't drink so much you can't remember what you committed to!
If you and your partner watch porn together, there should be no shortage of ideas.
Set the mood, relax, and be open to your partner's interests and ideas. If you're looking for a more immediate and direct approach, pick a movie (together) with a scene you'd like to re-enact. If you and your partner watch porn together, there should be no shortage of ideas.
3. Sexy Games Night
For something a little different on date night, why not play games with an erotic treatment? There are traditional, dependable games like Truth or Dare or Strip Poker (which we'll get into later), but almost any card or board game can turn a game night naughty with a few rule changes and risque jeopardy.
According to Psychology Professor Nicole K. McNichols, Ph.D:
Playfulness has also been shown to be a potent aphrodisiac! By being playful, couples feel more at ease experimenting with novel types of sexual experiences, ranging from having sex in an unusual position or place to incorporating accouterments or role play. Playfulness, it seems, is the perfect antidote to monotony, which can threaten the integrity of any long-term relationship. -- How Playfulness Can Transform Your Love Life – Psychology Today Magazine
Our top tips to make a sexy games night even more special
Try your favorite online sex shop or Amazon for specialist sex games; you'll be amazed at how many there are. If you're looking to utilize what you've already got to hand, raid your kids' toy boxes and get creative.
Strip Twister has been a favorite for years, but how about adding forfeits to Jenga and adhering different sex acts to the faces on Guess Who?
4. Romantic Staycation
Not everyone can whisk their partner to Paris for a romantic getaway, but even with everything that a hectic daily life throws at you, we can all still find a night for a sexy staycation.
Leave your home life at home and book into a boutique hotel or B&B for the night.
You can pretend you're anywhere in the world, but let's face it, sometimes it's more than enough to have the laundry and clutter out of site and a set of clean sheets in a bed you didn't make!
And if you haven't the budget for a hotel stay, don't worry; it's about the quality time you spend together, not the monetary cost, as couples therapist Dianne Grande, Ph.D, tells us:
If you can spare $20, you can “go out” on your date. On the other hand, sometimes you just don’t have the extra $20. In those times, why not plan an “at home” date? A candle-lit dinner after the children go to sleep or listening to your favorite music while dancing in your home can be as fun and romantic as any pricey restaurant. -- Date Night: Not a Luxury, a Necessity – Psychology Today Magazine
Our top tips to make a romantic staycation even more special
Seriously, this one doesn't need overthinking. Plan your evening around being in bed, and make the most of the peace. Order something extravagant from room service, and enjoy some slow, sensual sex together. It's a night that doesn't need a designated driver, so splash out on some sparkling wine and enjoy the bubbles!
5. Kinky Night
As far as sexy date night ideas go, exploring your kinks is for those who know exactly what they want and prefer a direct line to the action. If time is scarce, or you're already at your romance limit, getting straight to the acts you've been craving navigates unwanted efforts, concentrating purely on having your mind blown—and anything else if that's your fantasy.
That doesn't mean rushing. Planning is essential when it comes to exploring new ideas and kinks in your sex life.
Knowing precisely what turns each other on takes open communication and honest conversations. Anticipation will still play its part, as sending sexy texts based on your partner's ideas will build the mood as you approach your sexy date night.
And remember, kinks don't have to be those we see as standard. Moving away from traditional kinks such as BDSM, threesomes, role-playing, etc., opens the door to your favorite fantasies. It's a great way to boost communication, build trust, and get closer while enhancing the sex you share.
Our top tips to make kink night even more special
When adding new sexy twists to your sexual repertoire, planning is crucial. Do you need costumes or props? A new set of sex toys to test-drive? Perhaps a trip around your favorite online sex shop will provide ideas and help you approach the acts you need help bringing into the mix.
Take your time. To make the most of your new sexy date night ideas, whether in your own home or attending a specialist sex party, patience is key. We know you'll be excited, but don't let that affect just what lies ahead.
And remember, even when trying out new ideas with your partner, consent is crucial.
6. Strangers at a Bar
When it comes to role-playing on sexy date nights, nothing tops picking each other up in a bar.
For those in long-term relationships, revisiting that first date experience is a second chance (or as many second chances as you want) to do things differently, being the man you'd liked to have been the first time around.
You can use everything you've learned about each other to make your sexy dates count.
This time, you can spice things up as much as you want; without first-date nerves holding you back, you can give it everything you've got. Pick a favorite restaurant, bar, or hotel, put your best outfit on, and arrange to meet each other at the venue, making your own way there to build anticipation.
Our top tips to make your strangers at a bar night even more special
Make sure your underwear is just as sexy as the rest of your outfit, and make sure your personality, attitude, and confidence match it, too. Try heading somewhere you haven't been before to make your date night even more authentic.
Why not book into the nearest hotel to ensure matters end in the most exciting way possible?
If you don't have the budget for a room, why not head to the nearest bathroom together to relieve the sexual tension? You might not usually consider such a thing, but your new alter-ego can.
And remember, you don't know your new love interest yet, so ask them about their darkest and dirtiest secrets; what they tell you might not be true, but then again, it might be. Put them to the test later, giving them everything they asked for.
7. Sexy Massages
With abundant skin contact and undivided personal attention, a massage is an incredibly intimate gift.
Affectionate touch offers plenty of physiological and psychological benefits; date night is the perfect time to share it.
Mounting evidence suggests that experiencing love relates to psychological welfare, as indicated by increased well-being, and higher happiness. Love and attachment can further generate physiological benefits, such as better health, or higher resilience against stress and pain. We suggest that some of these beneficial effects of love can be mediated by the higher frequency of affectionate touch expressed in loving couples, as demonstrated in our study. -- Love and affectionate touch toward romantic partners all over the world – Scientific Reports Journal
Our top tips to make sexy massage date night even more special
To make the most of any massage, the best thing you can do is relax into it. We recommend setting the mood with tea lights or candles, soft lighting, and music, and why not draw your partner a bath first to ease them into it?
On sexy date nights, it makes sense you should both be naked or wearing something as small and sexy as possible.
Warm your hands and the massage oil before touching your partner. Start lightly on their back with long downward strokes, moving back up the sides. Slowly increase the pressure and the range of your attention. You can massage any part of the body, but we'd suggest starting innocently with backs, necks, and arms before moving onto legs, thighs, chests, and wherever the mood takes you. If you'd like to add a new toy to your repertoire, we're sure that would go down very well.
For those looking for more romance from their sexy date nights, spending time underneath the stars is one-way couples can find a way to reconnect. Plenty of apps can guide you around the stars to know what you're looking at but don't waste too much time staring at the screen when the real magic is the person right next to you.
Our top tips to make a stargazing date night even more special
A romantic picnic with sparkling wine, chocolates, and your partner's favorite treats will help build the mood; add soft and cozy blankets to keep warm, and who knows what you could get up to underneath them. There's a lot to be said for some midnight al fresco sex under the stars.
9. Sexy Bubble Bath Tub
For many, there's nothing more relaxing and luxurious than a sensuous bath enriched with essential oils, gentle background music, and candles, creating the perfect atmosphere.
The only thing to make it even better is enjoying it with a partner, curling up around a sensual and slippery body, enjoying all the intimacy that oiled-up naked touch provides.
Our top tips to make bubble bath date night even more special
When taking a romantic bath with your partner, romantic is the keyword. It's not an excuse to wash with your partner's expensive body and hair products but to bathe each other in kindness and care.
Respect the mood, add soft lighting and music, and maintain the perfect temperature.
Bubblebath creates a screen for those a little coy in new relationships, whereas bath bombs or rose petals add luxurious self-indulgence. However, your date night bath wouldn't be the same without chilled champagne, exquisite nibbles, and some lavish confectionary for you and your partner to enjoy together.
10. Threesome with a stranger
You won't find a more adventurous date night idea than picking up a playmate for a threesome, but for those who love exploring and pushing boundaries, it can be the most exciting and liberating thing they'll ever do.
Mixed-sex threesomes (MSTs) involving one’s romantic partner resulted in more positive outcomes than did those with casual partners. These results confirm that MSTs can be a satisfying experience particularly for heterosexual males and those participating with a romantic partner. -- An Empirical Investigation of Variations in Outcomes Associated with Heterosexual Adults’ Most Recent Mixed-Sex Threesome Experience - Archives of Sexual Behavior
Once again, clear communication is a must when deciding on which sex your third party will be, how and where you'll take your fun, and what your expectations are. You need to be comfortable with each other and your own sexuality so you can manage anything that might take you by surprise.
Our top tips to make a threesome date night even more special
To get the most from a threesome, it's essential to have ground rules. Number one is consent is a must. After that, you'll need to explain what you're comfortable with and any acts and behaviors that are strictly off the table.
To get the most from a threesome, it's essential to have ground rules.
Being prepared, with condoms, lube, toys, and props, is a great idea, and booking a hotel room—as taking a stranger back to where you live is incredibly risky—should be done before you go scouting for your third player. Taking care of admin isn't sexy, and if any problems arise when booking a room, it could be the mood killer you don't need.
11. Strip Poker Night
A hot and heavy game of poker where the stakes are seeing your partner slowly undress is a very popular sexy date night idea. Why? Because it's so much fun on so many levels.
If you're not a poker player, don't worry; it applies to any game or contest. Strip anything played in the right frame of mind will guarantee the same end result to a sexy date night.
You can play rounds for specific items of clothing, or if you've got a set of poker chips, why not start with the same amount, and the first one to lose all of their chips has to perform a striptease for the winner?
Our top tips to make strip poker date night even more special
For those in existing long-term relationships, stripping down to your usual tired old underwear isn't going to add any excitement, so for the best sessions, dress for the part. Wear the things that make the best of your body and that you know your partner loves to see in (and out of!)
Alternatively, if you're both serious poker players, why not change how you raise the stakes? Instead of each round being for a piece of clothing, why not throw something more personal or physical into the pot? If I win this round, I want you to..."
Stakes need to be something your partner wants, so find out what turns them on and build closer towards it.
Each additional bet will add jeopardy and anticipation. Your biggest stake should be the fantasy they're dying to try or the act that makes them climax the hardest.
12. Sexy Photoshoot
Whether it's a session with a professional photographer or you take the photographs yourselves, a sexy photoshoot is a great excuse to dress in your finest clothes and explore your sexiest inner self as you slowly lose each layer.
Build the mood by setting the scene: light candles, play soft music and sensually sip champagne as you discuss the poses and positions that explore confidence and deepen intimacy.
Our top tips to make your sexy photoshoot date night even more special
Play with lighting and positions to get the best results from your photos, but the real aim of exploring something different from your regular date nights is to have fun with each other.
This is a great opportunity to share what you love about each other's bodies—and later, you can show them just how much.
Posing, pouting, and looking natural have their place in your photoshoot; it's supposed to be a fun activity, after all. And you don't have to stick to one outfit—have a selection of costume changes, ensuring many are underwear or your sexiest stripped-back garments.
Conclusion – delivering an unforgettable date night
We hope you've enjoyed our selection of sexy date night ideas and found some inspiration to arouse your and your partner's interests. Whether it's staring at the night sky or a night sipping champagne in a hot tub, engaging in novel activities won't just lead to better sex but better, happier, and greater relationship satisfaction, too.
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